Beijing Newspeak

Yesterday, Xinhua released this story which highlighted a number of foreign media sources condemning the riots in Lhasa and accusing the Western media of showing the bias of a crown green bowl.

A precis: Pakistan Television said Pakistan opposed any attempts to violate “China’s sovereignty and territorial integrity”, Indonesian Chinese-language newspaper Guo Ji Ri Bao accused some western media or groups “harbouring evil intentions” of seizing upon the riots in Lhasa to tarnish China’s “image of peaceful development” and the LA Times quoted tourists describing the ferocity of the rioters. Singaporean paper Lianhe Zaobao said the Western media was playing its part in attempts to “sabotage” the Olympics, New Zealand TV3 relayed the anger of Chinese citizens in New Zealand at Western media bias and NZ’s Dominion Post published a reader’s letter saying people should stop labouring the human rights point and look at the actual situation in Tibet. The Albania-China friendship association said the riots were “premeditated splittist activities” and the Western media’s reporting was a “manifestation of their traditional prejudices”. And the former director of Romania’s national news agency said the riots were “elaborately planned” to discredit China.

Xinhua, forget about all that. Lay off the Tibet subject for a moment and make hay like you’ve never made hay before with this piece from Britain’s bastion of respectable journalism, the Daily Mail.

The headline goes: “I’m off to China to be with my bride: the food’s fresher, living is cheaper …. and bins are emptied TWICE a day.” Here it goes:

In just 18 months of marriage, Ken Miller and his bride have found the road to wedded bliss rather rocky.

There is their 25-year-age gap, the fact that they live 6,000 miles apart - not to mention the small matter of neither speaking the other’s language.

But when 70-year-old Mr Miller managed to secure his 46-year-old Chinese wife Lei Genxiou a place in his sheltered accommodation near Swansea, it seemed they would at last be together - until she was refused a visa.

So now he is turning his back on Britain and moving to China to be with her … and he can’t wait to get there.

Mr Miller will set up home in the south-western Chinese city of Nanning, where the couple married in 2006 after meeting on the Internet.

“The quality of life over there is much better than it is here,” he said. “The food is fresher, the lifestyle is cheaper, and you get your rubbish emptied twice a day.

“The British have an old-fashioned view of China. It is a great place to live. I know of people who have come from Nanning to live here, and hated it.

“In China, there are 14-lane roads in the middle of town lined with shrubs and trees which are never damaged by vandals.

“They’ve got shops that women over here would die for. I am very excited about going to live with Lei, and she is too. I have just been talking to her on the computer. We have never been closer.”

He has visited his bride three times since they married and says he will have no regrets about leaving Britain.

Recalling a recent visit to Nanning, he added: “We went out to a restaurant which served 30 different dishes of food. The bill for seven of us was £14, and we drank 35 pints of beer.

“So they haven’t got an NHS, but on practically every street there are doctors and dentists which are open 14 hours a day, seven days a week. And yes, they eat dogs there - but we eat deer and rabbits.”

Mr Miller, who has been married twice before, said they can live well off his pensions. “And my wife has a job as a buyer for a restaurant so I will definitely be well-fed.”

He dismisses anyone who might be tempted to question the basis of their relationship.

“People have said to me that she’s just after a visa. I say, ‘Yes, of course she wants a visa. Of course she wants a better life. And who can blame her?’ But it works both ways - I get companionship, so I think it’s a fair gamble.

“And now she has been refused a visa and we are still together, so what does that prove? This is my life and after all my years, I’ve earned the right to do as I please.”

Asked if he is nervous about moving to a country without understanding the language, he said: “Lei’s not taking English lessons, and I can’t say five words in Mandarin. But when we’re together, we communicate a lot through touch.

“I’ve been around long enough to know I’ll get by. You pick up the language more easily if you live in a country, and I might take some lessons.”

Their romance began after Mr Miller saw an advert in a local newspaper for a dating agency which specialised in matching British lonely hearts with Chinese brides.

After paying £300, he was put in touch with Lei and they began communicating via the internet.

He described the lifestyle he is seeking abroad with a younger woman as “every old man’s dream”.

Describing their mutual attraction, Mr Miller added: “She is absolutely gorgeous. She says I’m handsome. But whether or not she loves me, I don’t know. What is the definition of love anyway? I’ve only got a few years left, so I’m going to China and I’m not coming back.”

You could develop quite a few lines of argument here. Britain’s draconian visa laws? Carnivorous double standards? Or just proof the Western media is indeed Satan incarnate.

(Jim from Indianapolis makes a good point in the comments section. How do Ken and Lei communicate on the Internet given their language predicament?)

UPDATE: I can’t believe I’m updating this post but anyway … it appears the Daily Mail found the story in Wales on Sunday. The original article has a couple of amusing snippets and the answer, as kindly pointed out by Chris Crook in the comments section, to the how-do-they-communicate conundrum. Here are a few pars:

“I’ve heard all the knockers saying things like ‘she’s only after your money, Ken’, but we’ve been together 18 months now and if that was her intention she would have done it by now,” said the passionate pensioner, before pausing.

“Hang on, wait. I’ve got to put my teeth in.”

Ken continued: “Right, as I was saying, we’re even stronger than ever now so the doubters can get stuffed.

“I’ll admit the language barrier can get a bit frustrating, but we have a machine that can translate English to Mandarin and vice versa, although it tends to get things a bit wrong sometimes,” laughed the twice-married former Royal Navy man.

“One time she was trying to tell me she loved me, but it came up with, ‘you are a big elephant’ instead.

But the real answer as to how they communicate lies here:

Ken’s been investing in new technology so he can get to see Lei every day.

“I bought one of those web-cams and we get together two or three times a day.

“Actually, it’s surprising what you can do on those!”